The Art of Not Being a Human

There’s a big difference between a dog and a human which sets us apart.  I had this funny revelation when I was outside the other day, humped over pooping in the backyard.  Us dogs are funny when we have to go #2 as we sniff all over the yard, act like we are going to get “into position”, then move to another location and do that all over again, then we finally hunch over and look so funny when we go.  I know, it looks funny, but that is just how we do it.  But what is even funnier, is how we always seem so excited “after” the #2 that we run all over and have to tell our humans what we just did.  Like I said, there is a difference between a dog & a human, as you don’t see any “human” running around after a dump and looking for acceptance for “doing” a good job in the bathroom – now wouldn’t that be funny if us humans did? 

Us dogs also wait by the back door for their humans to arrive home and jump excited all over the place when they see us, run to grab a toy to bring to us, or even try to hump a leg or two in the process.  Us humans don’t do that, but wouldn’t it be funny if we jumped up and down when we see another human, sniffed their butt, ran to them with a wine glass in our mouth (our favorite thing), or ran around in circles in pure excitement?  Nope, that would never happen! 

As far as dog toys go, I know that I don’t share mine.  I know that my Mommy would hope that one day I would learn to put all of my toys back into my toy box at the end of the day, but that will never happen.  She walks around at the end of every day and picks up all of my toys (usually an armful) and when she touches them, I jump up and try to snag them out of her arms because no one plays with my toys!  Once she finally has all of them back into my toy box, I start pulling them out, one by one.  Us humans share things because that is the right thing to do. 

Don’t even get me going about “TREATS”, as I would do anything for them.  I usually start my begging for these tasty treats right after Daddy finishes dinner and sit so nicely next to him nodding my head in the direction of the treat jar.  He laughs every time I do this because he says that I am so smart, then once he reaches over for the jar, I get so excited and go through every trick I know in front of him as I get a few tasty bites.  Lately, he has even let me “pick” my own treat right from the jar and I stick my nose right into the jar and only pull out one.  What trick would us humans do if we wanted something badly?  Would we sit?  Beg?  Roll over?  Shake?  That would be funny if we did. 

There are so many differences between humans and dogs it’s true, but it would be funny if we traded places or started acting like the other – like if you walked into the kitchen to find your dog sitting at the table reading the Sunday paper, now that would be funny!   We coexist together quite nicely, us dogs and humans, and neither of us would not know what to do if we did not have each other, as us dogs make you happy & keep you company, and you the humans take such good care of us and give us a forever home & love that we need.  The perfect match!


2 thoughts on “The Art of Not Being a Human

    • LOL, I am not too fond of them, as us doggies don’t like wearing things on our heads. I know I don’t! And, I overheard the other day Daddy telling Mommy that I will be wearing a Birthday Hat again next month (7/18) and I am not looking forward to that! LOL Us doggies dress up to please our humans! 🙂

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